99 bottles of beer on the wall...

99 bottles of beer! Ugh, I'm so bored. Madeline's in the oven right now and I can't wait to paint her next layer! Here's what I just finished -- veins!



About to go in the oven!

So my next step will be flesh layers! I was soooo nervous to do the veining because I wanted to get it juuuust right! The first time I did it (on my Berenguer bath doll) they were WAY too dark and she looked like a little alien or something. I think I did ok on Madeline. I'm doing her before Leah just because that way if by trial and error I somehow screw her up a tiny bit, it won't kill me... lol.

Two more minutes and I get to take her out! But then I have to wait for her to cool... :(. Darn it. I just want to see what she'll look like when I'm done with her. I still have to order her a body, which is only like $20 bucks. ((Is that redundant? Twenty dollar bucks? Who knows...)) There is one on Ebay that I have my eye on, and as a plus it comes with a free little newborn hat.

Still waiting for the nameless baby brother to come in the mail; I really thought she'd be here today... but all I got was some more paints. I haven't decided what to name him because, as mentioned in one of my earlier posts, my husband HATES practically all boy names. One name we've kind of agreed on but I don't just looove is Brandon, which is my hubby's middle name. Maybe Brandon Rhys? I think that could be cute.

Yay! I just got Maddie out of the oven! The veins look great -- light and realistic! Can't wait till she cools, I hate the smell of her when she's hot. Ha! That just sounds weird.

Man I'm bored. What to do, what to do. I'm current on my Facebook feed, I've watched every single video on painting reborns on YouTube available so I can't do that... hmm.

Oh, I did some planting in my box garden this evening! I'll have to post a picture when I get some more sprouts. I transplanted a few of my herbs and also a tomato plant, some corn and radish sprouts. I sure hope something grows and we can harvest at least a few veggies later on. I still have squash, watermelon, canteloupe, eggplant and a couple other sprouts that need transplanting but hubby and I need to build our second garden box first!

Oh well, I guess I'll go surf the net some more to try and occupy myself for another half an hour, see ya!

xx Tierney

Baby fever...

So... last time I posted about having this weird case of baby fever, right? Well... it gets a little weirder. I'm sure you've seen that show, "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"... you have, haven't you? Thought so. Well it turns out... I didn't know I was pregnant. But wait, before you freak out... it's not what you think. Let me explain...

A while back (like a couple years ago) I was surfing around on the net just looking for these computerized dolls you used to be able to take into photoshop and shade and stuff to make clothes for them, you could build these virtual rooms and make little families, whatever you wanted. I just wanted to see if they were still around, and I stumbled upon something called a reborn doll. If you don't know what a reborn doll is, it is a life-sized soft vinyl doll that is molded to look very realistic as far as features, then people that are "reborn artists" paint them with Genesis Heat Set Oil paints in thin layers to create a VERY lifelike complexion. They even use felting needles to "root" mohair into the heads in a pattern that is so realistic, if you were to see one of these dolls on the street (a well done one) it would take you at least a few long seconds to even realize it wasn't real. To add to the realism even further, these artists weight the dolls limbs, soft cloth body, and head with glass beads, plastic pieces called "poly-pellets" and fiberfil, which  makes their head floppy just like a real baby's, and they usually weigh anywhere from 3 lbs. to 7.5 lbs. Some even have "belly plates" for posing with shirts up, and breathing mechanisms so their chests rise and fall when displayed.... eek.

These dolls, when painted well, will sell on Ebay for anywhere from $150 to sometimes $2000. Crazy, right?! But these dolls are not for children, only those who love to collect them, or a few of the crazies who have replaced their real life children who have grown out of that cuddly stage, and even fewer of the poor ladies that could never have children of their own. Some of these women actually buy carseats, cribs, strollers, playpens, bouncers, etc for their dolls and take them into PUBLIC! While I can see taking it out to show people who may be interested in buying a doll, it's kinda weird to just be carrying around a doll treating it as if it was a real baby, don't you think?

Anyway, at the time I was intrigued by these dolls but seeing as how they usually sell for more than $300, I knew they would always be out of my reach and kind of forgot about them. Fast forward to the present... I ran across them again on the internet, but I can't for the life of me remember how! Except this time, I ran across the kits... the plain, unpainted vinyl doll head and limbs, some sold with cloth bodies. I talked to my husband about them and showed him some pictures. We talked about how weird and cool they looked, how we liked the "sleeping" ones better because they weren't as eerie as the ones with wide open eyes just staring at you... all... the... time. O_O

After all was said and done, I had found a doll that I was in love with... on sell on Ebay for.... guess... ok, it was like $1600! I could have croaked. She was beautiful! She actually reminded me of my niece as a baby and I had that awful feeling of like, "I want that SO bad, but I know I'll never get it.... but I want it!" She looked a lot like this...

So cute, right?! Okay well maybe I'm going crazy but I have a soft spot for babies. Well let's call that a weakness... I just LOVE babies, ok?

Anywho, back to what I was getting at. I did quite a bit of snooping and actually found this doll kit for sale for $109! Still a bit of a splurge but definitely do-able! All I had to do was get my husband to agree, which wasn't hard, he likes her too! I am slowly getting all the things I need to "reborn" her, but I'm already practicing on a little Berenguer bath doll from K-Mart. I want to perfect my painting skills (or lack thereof) as much as I possibly can before laying a single brush bristle on her! By the way, this is the Noah sculpt by Reva Schick. Just thought I'd throw that out there... lol. There are so many layers I will have to do and I don't want to screw her up. I've already learned the hard way that the very first step of reborning a doll, veining, is an art. Too light and the veins don't show up. Too dark, and you cannot hide them! Right now my K-Mart bath doll looks like its head is about to explode because of all the veins popping out of it!

Also, the paints used on these dolls are very different from regular acrylics or oils. They are Genesis Heat Set Oils like I mentioned before... but the thing is, you put the paint on in very thin layers, then between each layer you have to BAKE your doll pieces at like 265 degrees for 8-9 minutes to set the paint, then... you can't get it off! Too. Much. Pressure! I so don't want to screw up this doll.

Here are some pictures... :)



"Leah" (what her name will be) when I first got her! :)



Close up



So cute!



Yes, I'm dressing her up... don't judge.



In my favorite sleeper of hers. :)

So I was talking to my husband's aunt about my new hobby, and it turns out she had gotten into reborning dolls too! Well actually, she had bought the stuff to reborn dolls but had never gotten really into it. She makes porcelain dolls and likes that too much to try vinyl. So she gave me her paints, and some dolls to practice on, and one limited edition doll that there are only 300 of in the world. It's the Federica sculpt by Fiorenza Biancheri. Here is a picture of Leah holding her head...



Her name will be "Madeline"



Annnd a close up!

She doesn't have a body yet :( but I will be getting her one as soon as I get time. I haven't even started painting her yet but I plan on starting this week! I'm so excited to try it, and I hope I'm good at it. Here are a couple shots of the world I'm in... :D



My "work" area.



My vein-y bath doll parts ready to be baked!

So there you have it... I didn't know I was "reborn pregnant"! Lol... I think I've found my temporary solution to baby fever, and I like it! No crying, no feedings or dirty diapers, just the fun of dressing and holding a newborn.... oh! and guess what!................ Leah and Madeline already have a baby brother on the way O_~

xx Tierney



I hate dreary weather...

It's cold. And rainy. And depressing.

I can't help but feel so sad when it's like this, but I keep trying to think of something to cheer myself up. I'm safe. I'm home with my sweet husband. I have a great life and awesome family. It still doesn't seem to help cheer me up.

I've been reading this blog about a mother who lost her 2 day old baby. It's so sad and she's documented the whole process, for her own healing and for encouraging others to reach out and find God. It's encouraging to see her healing from such a great loss. I'd like to think I could recover from a tragedy such as that... I'm glad I don't have to. Her little Maddie Grace was so so precious and sweet. Her story is very touching and I'm glad I got the chance to peer into the lives of such a sweet little family, though I wish it wasn't because of a blog inspired by the loss of one of their children. It's funny how you can read something and see it all playing out in your mind the way it's described. The words grab ahold of your heart and squeeze it so tightly you feel as if it's your own loss. You cry and laugh as you read, and you can actually feel the weight of their sorrow on your heart. As much as I now feel attached to this family, they know nothing of me, and probably never will. And while I had to read every word of the blog, it honestly has not truly "cheered me up"... not that it was meant to.

Ugh. I hate this weather.

I should be really happy right now... my husband is doing dishes. I'm not though; I feel guilty. He works all day and I am a housewife. I have not done dishes in a few days and now there is a full sink of them.

I think I have a weird case of baby fever. Except I don't. It's hard to explain, but I would love to have a sweet little newborn baby girl to take care of, to dress, to bond with and teach... and at the same time, I'm absolutely terrified of being a parent, raising a child, and what the future holds. I'm assuming it's for this reason that I stalk the forums on http://www.whattoexpect.com/ and wonder if I'm pregnant every month, just because I missed a pill or two. I wish I could just be a newborn's nanny.

I can't decide if I really want to have kids or not. My husband and I both always said we wanted them. Our ideal little family is the two of us and two little girls, not that you get to plan it out like that. I want to put pink bows on their little heads and kiss their cheeks. Pose them while they're sleeping and snap hundreds of photos. Paint their little nails and take them shopping... all of that. We even talk about names... and we're both super picky. What's funny is my husband doesn't like ANY boys' names.... none. I know he wants to have a daddy's little girl so bad. I want to give him one, but I don't know if we will decide to have babies or not. We go back and forth on the idea... who knows.

We've only been married for 3 months anyway (today is our 3 month anniversary, in fact) so if we do end up having children, hopefully it won't be anytime terribly soon. Of course, if we were to be surprised with a little "oops baby", we'd both be excited and very happy. But I'd like to plan a baby and hope for it.

Annnd let the depressing music begin... my husband just put pandora radio on in the kitchen to work to... ugh. Think I'll go cuddle with my kitties. Tata for now.

Out with the old...

Can we just say... it's time for a makeover?! Yes, please!!!

Men!!! Can't live with em...

Warning... this is kind of a rant. I'm sorry. But I'm a little upset with my fiance right now...

Here's a little back story. My fiance, Greg, and I have been together just over 2 years now. We met online and were friends for a few months, then things progressed and feelings developed so now we're engaged and are planning to marry on January 7th or 8th, 2011. He lives in Pennsylvania; I live in Texas. We see each other every day via Skype and that is our main line of communication when we're not together in person.

He is an awesome person and an amazing fiance. Yes, he does do some things I wish he wouldn't, and sometimes he hurts my feelings or annoys me. That happens, and I am most certain I do those things to him as well. But for the most part he is very considerate of my feelings and very tender and affectionate toward me, which I love.

Sometimes he just makes stupid mistakes... like today. While I'm rushing around like a chicken with its head cut off trying to take care of all my responsibilities before he basically rushes down here, marries me, and swoops me off to Pennsylvania, he doesn't really have to do anything except work and wait until the day that he flies down here. Meanwhile, I have to give all my notices, for my job, my apartment, etc etc etc. I have a dead car sitting at a mechanic's lot who wants to fix it for $300 too much and no way to tow it away, though I wouldn't be able to afford the storage charges I've been wracking up all the time it's been sitting there anyway. I have to separate up my entire life into what I can live without, and what I can take to PA. I have two cats, and can only bring one to live with us... and no idea what to do with the other one... or which one I'll choose. I have to arrange for the Justice of the Peace to marry us and find a place for us to actually get married... by myself. Plus, work, pay bills, and just live my daily life.

Today while I'm at work I get a text message -- from Greg. Of course I can't check it till I actually get off work, which was at 3 pm. It says, "Baby I love you more than life and I am wasted." Great. So as I'm driving to my landlord's to give her notice that I'll be leaving, I call him and he doesn't answer. So I decide I'll leave him a voicemail, but while I'm waiting for the beep, he calls me back. I asked him where he was and he says, "At the bar, but I'm about to go home." I asked him again and again not to drive, but he swears he's okay. I beg him not to drive, and try to reverse the situation to make him realize how serious this is and how worried I am about him. He admits he would be very upset with me if I were the one planning on driving home drunk from the bar. Yet he insists he is alright and is getting in the car to drive home.

The man pisses me off sometimes. I know a lot of people drive while under the influence, and some people don't think it's that big a deal. Well, to me it is. He seems to have no problem with risking his own life, whether by using his laptop while in the bathtub (plugged in), or driving home drunk. When he does things like that, that risk his life, it feels like he doesn't really care about me. I know that's not true. I know he loves me, but doing things like that doesn't show it. If he doesn't take care of himself, how is he supposed to take care of me? I'm supposed to be able to count on him and entrust him with my life, and I can't do that if he's putting his own life in danger.

He is apologizing now (on Skype), and says he doesn't know why he drinks too much and then drives home. Whatever. All I know is I am not a happy camper and I will be even more unhappy if this is still a problem after we're married. I'd probably be a fool to think it would change just because he was a married man and had a wife to come home to after work. I guess we'll see.

--Tierney

Uhmm... what am I supposed to do again?

Hey! So this is my first blog... ever. Yeah, don't expect much. I think I'm stuck... after two sentences that's pretty darn bad...

I guess I will start by telling you about my first Black Friday experience... boring I know, but hey! you were warned. It will get more interesting I promi.... forget it I'm not promising anything.

It's Thursday night. I have to go to work at 6:45 in the morning. The ONLY store in town that is having Black Friday special sales is Wal-Mart. Yes. I do live in a tiny tiny town where Wal-Mart is the grocery store and local hangout. Anyway, I have been eyeing this Paula Deen cookware set for ages and every time I walk through Wally World, I have to go touch it and imagine cooking with it... like I cook. Well, it just so happened to be on the Black Friday circular. Yay. So my friend and fellow blogger, Ellie Mosellen, and I decided to venture out to good old Wal-Mart to do a little Black Friday shopping. The checking out of sale items didn't begin until 12:01 am, so we figure to get what we want, we should be there fairly early... 11:00 pm. We go in, stand by my cookware and some down pillows we wanted, and wait. Other people start standing by the items they want and it starts getting a little crowded.

Now in my mind, I start envisioning the things we've heard about on the news. I'm mentally preparing myself to grab the box of cookware as fast as I can, kick the old lady in the knee cap that grabbed it too, yank it from her and put it in my cart and get away as fast as I can, guarding it and never taking my eyes off of it, because someone could wait till I wasn't looking and snatch it from my cart. I don't know if I can do this... I mean I do want that cookware, but do I want it that bad? I saw a woman with her small child in a stroller and thought to myself... not "What is she doing with a 3 year old up at midnight?", but "What was she thinking bringing a child into this store on Black Friday?! Doesn't she know it's going to be like a herd of cattle in here once they make that announcement? Crazy woman! Risking her child's life..." By this point my heart's beating a little faster and I notice a woman come up behind me, eyeing the cookware, it's still only 11:30, and the end cap is surrounded, but I'm right next to my box. I ask her what color she wants, and it's the red. Good. I want the blue. I felt a little better about that.

Snap back to reality... about 10 minutes before midnight, an announcement is made that the wrapped pallets will be cut open but we can't check out until 12:01. People look around at each other and shrug, then start filling their carts. I grabbed my cookware, met Ellie with the pillows, and then we walked to the movies. I got several of those, though it was a little difficult maneuvering my cart around the others, it really wasn't a big deal. We then walked to the registers, checked the clock... 12:02 and proceeded to checkout. And then it was over. I was home by 12:15 and in bed by 1 am.

I should be happy I didn't get trampled to death by crazed shoppers in the middle of the night. I don't even like drama. But I have to admit I was a little disappointed at the lack of excitement surrounding my first Black Friday experience. Oh well, I guess there's always next year, and I'll be living in a new city, in a new state, halfway across the country... maybe they'll trample me there.

--Tierney

Oh and FYI... this post is not to make light of those who have actually been trampled on occasions such as these. And no, I really don't wish I or anyone else had been injured. I just think it's funny that what I had imagined Black Friday to be was nothing like what it really was.